








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 559 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 125 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1212 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,056 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1115 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1800 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1496 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 645 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $352,619 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | no aim, but aggressive | 62% | 13 |
| #2 | TitanG | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Noname | 54% | 13 |
| #4 | ox | 52% | 48 |
| #5 | mohant | 50% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Hanzii | 42% | 36 |
| #10 | IceMouse | 41% | 103 |
| #11 | Blazy | 39% | 59 |
| #12 | Anže | 38% | 58 |
| #13 | Fanika | 27% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IceMouse | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Anže | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | JKuplungaS | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | no aim, but aggressive | 2 | 0.0069 |
| #5 | ox | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lottospieler | 169 | 0.26 | 5 min |
| #2 | mohant | 122 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | IceMouse | 112 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | JKuplungaS | 73 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Blazy | 61 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blazy | +4.00 | 79 | 61 |
| #2 | TitanG | +3.48 | 67 | 54 |
| #3 | no aim, but aggressive | +1.24 | 76 | 57 |
| #4 | Noname | +1.01 | 67 | 63 |
| #5 | Anže | +0.99 | 86 | 47 |





