








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 431 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 257 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4568 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,579 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2416 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1201 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 2561 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 401 | 6% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,008,582 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 467 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Noname | 59% | 27 |
| #2 | Mr. James | 56% | 18 |
| #3 | M4n9ac<3 | 50% | 101 |
| #4 | BMW #blyant | 50% | 26 |
| #5 | Kirkebrann666 | 42% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M4n9ac<3 | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | BMW #blyant | 3 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | Mr. James | 3 | 0.0080 |
| #4 | Kirkebrann666 | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Noname | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fix it felix | 184 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #2 | M4n9ac<3 | 78 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #3 | Noname | 49 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | Mr. James | 47 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | Kirkebrann666 | 46 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☚Taddo-Official☛ | +3.70 | 87 | 50 |
| #2 | Mr. James | +3.30 | 68 | 50 |
| #3 | Noname | +0.31 | 63 | 75 |
| #4 | M4n9ac<3 | -0.71 | 55 | 58 |
| #5 | BMW #blyant | -0.96 | 61 | 57 |





