








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 163 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 256 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3138 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,078 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2563 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2255 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2116 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2144 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $899,813 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 33 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | AriG. °_° | 48% | 56 |
| #9 | Señor Niguel | 47% | 59 |
| #10 | Nipanderi | 44% | 32 |
| #11 | Colonel Higunov | 43% | 21 |
| #12 | NAKK1.cfg | 42% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3SK0 | 867 | 0.22 | 19 min |
| #2 | nutipää | 656 | 0.26 | 17 min |
| #3 | valio kevytmaito 1.75l | 555 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #4 | Señor Niguel | 156 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | Nipanderi | 116 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Señor Niguel | +1.86 | 67 | 65 |
| #2 | 3SK0 | +1.26 | 68 | 64 |
| #3 | gale | +0.86 | 79 | 59 |
| #4 | rasmus | +0.01 | 87 | 38 |
| #5 | Jonski | -0.59 | 60 | 44 |





