








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 563 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 43 matches | ||
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




54 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3896 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,827 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3926 | 40% |
| Smokes | 2398 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1227 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 2276 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,278,838 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 235 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kill Streak csgoroll.com | 20 | 0.0088 |
| #2 | Janji | 12 | 0.0114 |
| #3 | bigcat | 9 | 0.0067 |
| #4 | Taka | 8 | 0.0066 |
| #5 | I Pipelined Your Mom DROP.SKIN | 5 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kill Streak csgoroll.com | 207 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #2 | Taka | 182 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | flashfpyc | 148 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | I Pipelined Your Mom DROP.SKIN | 148 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | chuzzle player | 94 | 0.05 | 2 min |





