








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 389 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1188 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,112 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1766 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1698 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 630 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 1018 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $189,388 of utility $64 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 152 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dj_steven | 55% | 22 |
| #2 | Shinc | 44% | 25 |
| #3 | old_donnieg | 41% | 44 |
| #4 | The Purge | 36% | 14 |
| #5 | MALGORA | 27% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dj_steven | 55% | 22 |
| #2 | Shinc | 44% | 25 |
| #3 | old_donnieg | 41% | 44 |
| #4 | The Purge | 36% | 14 |
| #5 | MALGORA | 27% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dj_steven | 4 | 0.0089 |
| #2 | The Purge | 2 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | old_donnieg | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Shinc | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dj_steven | 154 | 0.34 | 3 min |
| #2 | old_donnieg | 93 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Shinc | 37 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | MALGORA | 1 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| #5 | The Purge | 1 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dj_steven | +3.00 | 82 | 68 |
| #2 | Archie | +2.61 | 51 | 65 |
| #3 | Shinc | -1.54 | 33 | 44 |
| #4 | MALGORA | -3.64 | 18 | 19 |
| #5 | The Purge | -4.55 | 28 | 28 |





