








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1251 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 651 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7798 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,256 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3694 | 17% |
| Smokes | 6466 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 6407 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 5689 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,309,713 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 307 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LANDÖ | 57% | 108 |
| #2 | LLVM い炎ト | 56% | 73 |
| #3 | Cudge | 54% | 61 |
| #4 | Lemon Man | 53% | 43 |
| #5 | PowerfulDrop | 53% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Cudge | 54% | 61 |
| #4 | Lemon Man | 53% | 43 |
| #5 | PowerfulDrop | 53% | 43 |
| #6 | upgrade | 53% | 290 |
| #7 | taz | 51% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | upgrade | 12 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | LANDÖ | 11 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | LLVM い炎ト | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Lemon Man | 4 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | PowerfulDrop | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | upgrade | 386 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #2 | LANDÖ | 304 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | LLVM い炎ト | 207 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #4 | Cudge | 175 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | taz | 161 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LANDÖ | +4.00 | 80 | 64 |
| #2 | LLVM い炎ト | +3.39 | 76 | 63 |
| #3 | taz | +1.55 | 72 | 64 |
| #4 | Lemon Man | +1.51 | 67 | 62 |
| #5 | PowerfulDrop | +0.65 | 74 | 58 |





