








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1 achievement has been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
524 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,855 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 451 | 24% |
| Smokes | 605 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 408 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 391 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $147,368 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BamBoozle | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | kesierzg | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | Furness | 43% | 23 |
| #4 | mrs | 39% | 28 |
| #5 | Bradley | 17% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BamBoozle | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | kesierzg | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | Furness | 43% | 23 |
| #4 | mrs | 39% | 28 |
| #5 | Bradley | 17% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mrs | 3 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | Furness | 3 | 0.0074 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mrs | 57 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #2 | Furness | 41 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | Bradley | 9 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| #4 | BamBoozle | 9 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #5 | kesierzg | 1 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BamBoozle | +8.52 | 86 | 62 |
| #2 | mrs | +1.63 | 78 | 61 |
| #3 | Furness | +1.36 | 60 | 57 |
| #4 | STEVE | -0.48 | 39 | 56 |
| #5 | Bradley | -2.57 | 19 | 48 |





