










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1124 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 410 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




120 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3653 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,797 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1364 | 13% |
| Smokes | 769 | 7% |
| HE Grenades | 4935 | 46% |
| Molotovs | 3729 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $862,676 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 821 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pepesauras | 45% | 38 |
| #2 | MOUSE610 | 45% | 38 |
| #3 | pan[i]k ' | 41% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pepesauras | 45% | 38 |
| #2 | MOUSE610 | 45% | 38 |
| #3 | pan[i]k ' | 41% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MOUSE610 | 5 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | Pepesauras | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | pan[i]k ' | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MOUSE610 | 106 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #2 | pan[i]k ' | 62 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | Pepesauras | 52 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MOUSE610 | +4.42 | 79 | 69 |
| #2 | Pepesauras | +1.62 | 69 | 55 |
| #3 | pan[i]k ' | +0.35 | 39 | 52 |
| #4 | Anal Beads | -1.06 | 11 | 35 |





