










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Esplay | 5 matches | 1,810 | |
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
360 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,422 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 329 | 23% |
| Smokes | 428 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 370 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 295 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $97,914 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 111 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | grodgolf wavy | 25% | 4 |
| #10 | Flerres | 25% | 8 |
| #11 | 1qe | 0% | 2 |
| #12 | oedmjuk | 0% | 3 |
| #13 | shrimpmontana | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DEEP POCKETS | 8 | 0.0240 |
| #2 | IlIlIlI | 3 | 0.0278 |
| #3 | grodgolf wavy | 3 | 0.0349 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DEEP POCKETS | 49 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #2 | Flerres | 29 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #3 | grodgolf wavy | 28 | 0.33 | 1 min |
| #4 | shrimpmontana | 14 | 0.21 | 0 min |
| #5 | IlIlIlI | 12 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | grodgolf wavy | +5.28 | 62 | 61 |
| #2 | IlIlIlI | +5.27 | 82 | 42 |
| #3 | JaH | +4.89 | 88 | 75 |
| #4 | 27cmSwing(nIKLAK) | +4.75 | 69 | 73 |
| #5 | PolitikerN^ Slakt'ARNE | +3.21 | 85 | 57 |





