








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 58 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
663 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,397 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 380 | 16% |
| Smokes | 541 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 667 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 809 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $230,162 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 298 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TOMAS | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | Masakatsu | 62% | 21 |
| #3 | 死 | 60% | 10 |
| #4 | Crecker | 54% | 68 |
| #5 | ArnasZakas | 47% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TOMAS | 5 | 0.0118 |
| #2 | 死 | 5 | 0.0222 |
| #3 | Crecker | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | Masakatsu | 4 | 0.0094 |
| #5 | Jonis | 3 | 0.0330 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crecker | 219 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #2 | Masakatsu | 36 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | ArnasZakas | 33 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | 死 | 33 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | Jonis | 18 | 0.20 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TOMAS | +6.20 | 91 | 46 |
| #2 | Jonis | +2.01 | 73 | 66 |
| #3 | Crecker | +1.47 | 54 | 70 |
| #4 | 死 | +0.30 | 75 | 66 |
| #5 | SinisterReach | -0.02 | 45 | 47 |





