








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 50 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1986 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,868 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1677 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1109 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 854 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1228 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $266,180 of utility $89 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Astolfo | 53% | 47 |
| #2 | NightHelll | 53% | 17 |
| #3 | RangerOz | 52% | 50 |
| #4 | o0IH0o | 51% | 51 |
| #5 | Mrspy | 51% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Mrspy | 51% | 93 |
| #6 | DataGridView | 49% | 35 |
| #7 | sharshark | 44% | 18 |
| #8 | r0092440 | 38% | 21 |
| #9 | ヤヤえもん | 37% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Astolfo | 7 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | Mrspy | 5 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | RangerOz | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | ヤヤえもん | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | o0IH0o | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mrspy | 560 | 0.31 | 13 min |
| #2 | RangerOz | 242 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #3 | o0IH0o | 153 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | ✪ Astolfo | 146 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #5 | ヤヤえもん | 126 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Magisk | +5.72 | 68 | 63 |
| #2 | ✪ Astolfo | +5.05 | 84 | 54 |
| #3 | Mrspy | -0.45 | 26 | 66 |
| #4 | o0IH0o | -1.73 | 7 | 48 |
| #5 | RangerOz | -4.43 | 5 | 56 |





