








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank |
|---|
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
86 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 599 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 158 | 26% |
| Smokes | 97 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 208 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 136 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $29,840 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mullelele | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | Jaken med baken ☛☚ | 40% | 5 |
| #3 | Submarine Peter | 35% | 17 |
| #4 | 0.3mbit/s | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mullelele | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | Jaken med baken ☛☚ | 40% | 5 |
| #3 | Submarine Peter | 35% | 17 |
| #4 | 0.3mbit/s | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0.3mbit/s | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0.3mbit/s | 13 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #2 | Submarine Peter | 12 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #3 | Jaken med baken ☛☚ | 6 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #4 | Mullelele | 1 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0.3mbit/s | +0.59 | 72 | 55 |
| #2 | Jaken med baken ☛☚ | +0.09 | 79 | 66 |
| #3 | Mullelele | -0.26 | 69 | 20 |
| #4 | Submarine Peter | -1.33 | 52 | 49 |
| #5 | Nisse with neatness | -2.64 | 56 | 68 |





