










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 18 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 65 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
740 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,051 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 383 | 19% |
| Smokes | 556 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 690 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 422 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $320,664 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kuba | 100% | 6 |
| #2 | Svorsken | 56% | 32 |
| #3 | Hobbe | 53% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kuba | 100% | 6 |
| #2 | Svorsken | 56% | 32 |
| #3 | Hobbe | 53% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hobbe | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | Svorsken | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Svorsken | 35 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #2 | Hobbe | 29 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #3 | Kuba | 21 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kuba | +4.53 | 48 | 51 |
| #2 | Bobby | +0.33 | 44 | 44 |
| #3 | Svorsken | -1.34 | 44 | 48 |
| #4 | Hobbe | -2.87 | 19 | 46 |





