








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1360 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 587 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 127 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 141 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




52 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5808 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,288 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7294 | 29% |
| Smokes | 5666 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 8299 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 4029 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,572,730 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 918 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steffyyy | 50% | 54 |
| #2 | krisxytw0w | 48% | 417 |
| #3 | Nevlanden | 48% | 61 |
| #4 | Seglem | 47% | 329 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steffyyy | 50% | 54 |
| #2 | krisxytw0w | 48% | 417 |
| #3 | Nevlanden | 48% | 61 |
| #4 | Seglem | 47% | 329 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Seglem | 26 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | krisxytw0w | 24 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | Steffyyy | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Nevlanden | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Seglem | 1253 | 0.18 | 27 min |
| #2 | krisxytw0w | 940 | 0.10 | 21 min |
| #3 | Nevlanden | 211 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #4 | Steffyyy | 67 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nevlanden | +3.53 | 69 | 77 |
| #2 | Steffyyy | +0.28 | 41 | 66 |
| #3 | m0rm0r | +0.06 | 56 | 66 |
| #4 | krisxytw0w | +0.01 | 54 | 69 |
| #5 | Seglem | -0.59 | 50 | 62 |





