








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 125 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September






The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1303 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,911 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1290 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1355 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 786 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 480 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $362,259 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 90 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wonkadonka | 88% | 8 |
| #2 | ♥ | 67% | 9 |
| #3 | FungsArmy - TheHolk | 63% | 8 |
| #4 | bexy | 62% | 39 |
| #5 | Bobb Tschigerillo | 58% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | bexy | 62% | 39 |
| #5 | Bobb Tschigerillo | 58% | 12 |
| #6 | phil | 56% | 16 |
| #7 | Nazuna | 56% | 43 |
| #8 | elim23 | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nazuna | 4 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | Bobb Tschigerillo | 2 | 0.0080 |
| #3 | elim23 | 2 | 0.0139 |
| #4 | FungsArmy - TheHolk | 1 | 0.0059 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | phil | 75 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #2 | bexy | 70 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | Bobb Tschigerillo | 35 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #4 | elim23 | 25 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #5 | ♥ | 16 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wonkadonka | +8.08 | 97 | 74 |
| #2 | Nazuna | +2.28 | 80 | 8 |
| #3 | Akeno | +1.35 | 62 | 60 |
| #4 | phil | +0.36 | 63 | 65 |
| #5 | Bobb Tschigerillo | -0.72 | 56 | 65 |





