








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 287 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 119 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 42 matches | ||
| Wingman | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2860 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,637 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2247 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3862 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 3612 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1916 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,791,818 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 266 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Recently | 48% | 117 |
| #2 | Shanks D. Snitch | 46% | 108 |
| #3 | Pope TM | 44% | 158 |
| #4 | CracklingReaper | 42% | 26 |
| #5 | Robin D. Banks | 41% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Recently | 48% | 117 |
| #2 | Shanks D. Snitch | 46% | 108 |
| #3 | Pope TM | 44% | 158 |
| #4 | CracklingReaper | 42% | 26 |
| #5 | Robin D. Banks | 41% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pope TM | 44 | 0.0147 |
| #2 | Shanks D. Snitch | 11 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | Recently | 10 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | Robin D. Banks | 4 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pope TM | 368 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #2 | Recently | 290 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | Shanks D. Snitch | 142 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | CracklingReaper | 128 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #5 | Robin D. Banks | 67 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shanks D. Snitch | +1.69 | 61 | 49 |
| #2 | Pope TM | +1.29 | 82 | 52 |
| #3 | B1gmacattack | -0.82 | 26 | 52 |
| #4 | CracklingReaper | -1.15 | 66 | 47 |
| #5 | Robin D. Banks | -1.22 | 18 | 41 |





