








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 510 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 92 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2062 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,223 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2096 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2388 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1353 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1386 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $787,118 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 58 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zemons | 60% | 63 |
| #2 | Zeme ♿ | 57% | 97 |
| #3 | Stickflex | 54% | 69 |
| #4 | Croniz | 53% | 113 |
| #5 | knoDD ♿ | 53% | 116 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stickflex | 17 | 0.0126 |
| #2 | Croniz | 13 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | Zemons | 8 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | knoDD ♿ | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Zeme ♿ | 3 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zeme ♿ | 468 | 0.24 | 14 min |
| #2 | Zemons | 308 | 0.24 | 8 min |
| #3 | knoDD ♿ | 283 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | Stickflex | 206 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #5 | Croniz | 157 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zeme ♿ | +4.19 | 79 | 80 |
| #2 | Zemons | +3.74 | 87 | 70 |
| #3 | Anders | +2.64 | 72 | 69 |
| #4 | knoDD ♿ | +0.97 | 53 | 65 |
| #5 | Croniz | +0.85 | 74 | 55 |





