








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 254 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 163 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2639 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,556 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2576 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1820 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1390 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1770 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $646,396 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 33 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pixel- | 63% | 41 |
| #2 | BrunnãoxD | 59% | 32 |
| #3 | G4messsv | 55% | 11 |
| #4 | Kalaninhas | 55% | 22 |
| #5 | ash^_'' | 54% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Dkz | 50% | 16 |
| #10 | HasLoNTC "77" | 48% | 23 |
| #11 | leo | 46% | 28 |
| #12 | Kainx | 45% | 11 |
| #13 | jessz | 45% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Netooh ツ | 782 | 0.23 | 19 min |
| #2 | ash^_'' | 461 | 0.23 | 11 min |
| #3 | Galoh | 388 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #4 | jessz | 320 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #5 | BrunnãoxD | 224 | 0.32 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kalaninhas | +2.38 | 78 | 70 |
| #2 | JapaK1ng | +2.19 | 82 | 68 |
| #3 | Netooh ツ | +0.64 | 77 | 73 |
| #4 | ash^_'' | +0.42 | 80 | 76 |
| #5 | HasLoNTC "77" | +0.38 | 58 | 48 |





