








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 610 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 545 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 83 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5934 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,570 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5220 | 23% |
| Smokes | 6842 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 5775 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 4733 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,896,420 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 386 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joaaxd | 62% | 65 |
| #2 | Zonox | 55% | 477 |
| #3 | Quaxieツ | 54% | 541 |
| #4 | Quany | 51% | 269 |
| #5 | HanseMand | 46% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joaaxd | 62% | 65 |
| #2 | Zonox | 55% | 477 |
| #3 | Quaxieツ | 54% | 541 |
| #4 | Quany | 51% | 269 |
| #5 | HanseMand | 46% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zonox | 23 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Quaxieツ | 15 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Quany | 4 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quaxieツ | 2929 | 0.24 | 83 min |
| #2 | Zonox | 1479 | 0.14 | 38 min |
| #3 | Quany | 868 | 0.14 | 24 min |
| #4 | HanseMand | 180 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | Joaaxd | 141 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zonox | +1.59 | 67 | 61 |
| #2 | Quaxieツ | +0.68 | 61 | 67 |
| #3 | Quany | +0.04 | 77 | 72 |
| #4 | NitterShitter | -0.11 | 69 | 59 |
| #5 | Joaaxd | -1.20 | 64 | 58 |





