








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 447 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 124 matches | ||
| Faceit | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 47 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2979 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,527 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4313 | 34% |
| Smokes | 3667 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2418 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2129 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,599,385 of utility $172 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 54 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bo. ♿ | 81% | 58 |
| #2 | dexonovsky- | 76% | 121 |
| #3 | blbn | 75% | 114 |
| #4 | ✞ Mimo ✞ | 72% | 81 |
| #5 | magISCO | 67% | 119 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⛧ Zbaru ❟❛❟ | 8 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | м ✗ נ к | 7 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | INSOLANT | 6 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | Major | 6 | 0.0060 |
| #5 | Yolonafide | 5 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dexonovsky- | 530 | 0.20 | 16 min |
| #2 | bo. ♿ | 409 | 0.31 | 9 min |
| #3 | magISCO | 300 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #4 | blbn | 240 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #5 | INSOLANT | 225 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dexonovsky- | +6.78 | 89 | 73 |
| #2 | bo. ♿ | +2.42 | 71 | 76 |
| #3 | INSOLANT | +1.56 | 71 | 54 |
| #4 | ⛧ Zbaru ❟❛❟ | +1.30 | 69 | 27 |
| #5 | Yolonafide | +0.60 | 54 | 59 |





