








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 411 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 225 matches | ||
| Premier | 123 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 24 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5886 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,123 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4192 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4256 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 5561 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 5114 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,036,198 of utility $197 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 404 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HᴀᴋᴜɴᴀMᴀᴛᴀᴛᴀ | 59% | 51 |
| #2 | ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | 54% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HᴀᴋᴜɴᴀMᴀᴛᴀᴛᴀ | 59% | 51 |
| #2 | ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | 54% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HᴀᴋᴜɴᴀMᴀᴛᴀᴛᴀ | 176 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #2 | ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | 173 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HᴀᴋᴜɴᴀMᴀᴛᴀᴛᴀ | +1.38 | 79 | 64 |
| #2 | ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | +0.93 | 71 | 60 |
| #3 | Ston1e °.° | +0.41 | 49 | 58 |





