








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 132 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 174 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Esplay | 1 match | 1,835 | |
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1672 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,831 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1347 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1526 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1694 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1264 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $645,657 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | im him | 65% | 20 |
| #2 | Caleb | 64% | 39 |
| #3 | zalky | 60% | 63 |
| #4 | FCZTORE | 60% | 20 |
| #5 | nano | 57% | 80 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Caleb | +2.51 | 71 | 63 |
| #2 | nano | +2.15 | 79 | 75 |
| #3 | im him | +2.05 | 66 | 52 |
| #4 | zalky | +1.49 | 73 | 73 |
| #5 | Ellen är SILVER 1 | +0.39 | 61 | 59 |





