








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 13 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 201 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 70 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2708 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,641 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2646 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2545 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1660 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1790 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $402,277 of utility $61 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 494 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mJ | 50% | 108 |
| #2 | Veo≛ | 47% | 89 |
| #3 | вєηzσ¢αяρу | 43% | 21 |
| #4 | Teigen | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mJ | 50% | 108 |
| #2 | Veo≛ | 47% | 89 |
| #3 | вєηzσ¢αяρу | 43% | 21 |
| #4 | Teigen | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Veo≛ | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | mJ | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #3 | вєηzσ¢αяρу | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mJ | 132 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #2 | Veo≛ | 127 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | вєηzσ¢αяρу | 37 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | Teigen | 21 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | вєηzσ¢αяρу | +1.41 | 57 | 64 |
| #2 | mJ | +0.69 | 59 | 51 |
| #3 | Veo≛ | -0.20 | 60 | 52 |
| #4 | kTp | -0.21 | 50 | 62 |
| #5 | Teigen | -3.34 | 12 | 46 |





