








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 835 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 398 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 66 matches | ||
| Faceit | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7131 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,365 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5274 | 23% |
| Smokes | 5847 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5190 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 7054 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,787,168 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 297 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr. Rick Dagless M.D. | 58% | 45 |
| #2 | RagtagXMASTER | 50% | 216 |
| #3 | Sp00lin' | 50% | 292 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr. Rick Dagless M.D. | 58% | 45 |
| #2 | RagtagXMASTER | 50% | 216 |
| #3 | Sp00lin' | 50% | 292 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sp00lin' | 16 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | RagtagXMASTER | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | Dr. Rick Dagless M.D. | 2 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sp00lin' | 832 | 0.13 | 17 min |
| #2 | RagtagXMASTER | 177 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #3 | Dr. Rick Dagless M.D. | 138 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr. Rick Dagless M.D. | +5.98 | 92 | 64 |
| #2 | SizKhalifa | +0.82 | 81 | 65 |
| #3 | RagtagXMASTER | -1.14 | 46 | 50 |
| #4 | Sp00lin' | -2.43 | 48 | 55 |





