








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 758 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 461 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 99 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




46 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3931 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,860 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4956 | 24% |
| Smokes | 6161 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 5176 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 4567 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,511,880 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 798 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Oegel | 50% | 441 |
| #2 | SniglO | 49% | 404 |
| #3 | odÅGA | 48% | 199 |
| #4 | virre | 47% | 324 |
| #5 | steve | 46% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Oegel | 50% | 441 |
| #2 | SniglO | 49% | 404 |
| #3 | odÅGA | 48% | 199 |
| #4 | virre | 47% | 324 |
| #5 | steve | 46% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Oegel | 35 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | SniglO | 17 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | odÅGA | 17 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | virre | 15 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | steve | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Oegel | 979 | 0.10 | 22 min |
| #2 | SniglO | 789 | 0.09 | 21 min |
| #3 | virre | 696 | 0.10 | 18 min |
| #4 | odÅGA | 653 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #5 | steve | 570 | 0.20 | 16 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flux | +0.85 | 47 | 68 |
| #2 | SniglO | +0.32 | 69 | 73 |
| #3 | odÅGA | +0.20 | 67 | 67 |
| #4 | Oegel | -0.80 | 46 | 61 |
| #5 | virre | -1.20 | 35 | 70 |





