










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 341 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 171 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2042 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,635 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2205 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2068 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2269 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2093 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $540,336 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 69 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ | 52% | 46 |
| #2 | DOU_BLE_T | 52% | 69 |
| #3 | staga | 51% | 55 |
| #4 | Lappis | 50% | 24 |
| #5 | TheOneAndOnly | 50% | 114 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DOU_BLE_T | +2.52 | 83 | 65 |
| #2 | TheOneAndOnly | +1.34 | 60 | 80 |
| #3 | Lappis | +1.22 | 59 | 56 |
| #4 | ala san | +0.68 | 78 | 72 |
| #5 | iBe | +0.62 | 69 | 60 |





