








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
197 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 706 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 26 | 4% |
| Smokes | 59 | 8% |
| HE Grenades | 321 | 45% |
| Molotovs | 300 | 42% |
Our logs show you have wasted $37,111 of utility $49 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Komp1ex | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | sweatieeeballz | 35% | 20 |
| #3 | PilCosby | 33% | 3 |
| #4 | Bdubx19x | 32% | 28 |
| #5 | Keyser 702 | 29% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | PilCosby | 33% | 3 |
| #4 | Bdubx19x | 32% | 28 |
| #5 | Keyser 702 | 29% | 24 |
| #6 | GlockLesnar | 17% | 6 |
| #7 | HOOSIERdaddy740 | 0% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bdubx19x | 3 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | PilCosby | 3 | 0.0500 |
| #3 | Keyser 702 | 2 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | sweatieeeballz | 2 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | HOOSIERdaddy740 | 2 | 0.0118 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sweatieeeballz | 47 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #2 | Keyser 702 | 31 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Bdubx19x | 18 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #4 | GlockLesnar | 15 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #5 | HOOSIERdaddy740 | 12 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Komp1ex | +6.52 | 96 | 17 |
| #2 | sweatieeeballz | +6.12 | 83 | 31 |
| #3 | PilCosby | +5.13 | 93 | 59 |
| #4 | GlockLesnar | -1.06 | 29 | 41 |
| #5 | Keyser 702 | -1.56 | 25 | 44 |





