










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 292 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
882 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,857 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 570 | 31% |
| Smokes | 486 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 400 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 401 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $374,122 of utility $219 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 125 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SkulL | 79% | 24 |
| #2 | rekonz lft | 74% | 53 |
| #3 | surefire cheeseball | 72% | 61 |
| #4 | Winnieeeee | 67% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SkulL | 79% | 24 |
| #2 | rekonz lft | 74% | 53 |
| #3 | surefire cheeseball | 72% | 61 |
| #4 | Winnieeeee | 67% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rekonz lft | 8 | 0.0080 |
| #2 | surefire cheeseball | 6 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rekonz lft | 226 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #2 | surefire cheeseball | 190 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #3 | SkulL | 126 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #4 | Winnieeeee | 32 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rekonz lft | +4.74 | 72 | 74 |
| #2 | cookie | +2.98 | 85 | 55 |
| #3 | surefire cheeseball | +2.85 | 75 | 80 |
| #4 | SkulL | +2.54 | 78 | 89 |
| #5 | Winnieeeee | +0.42 | 77 | 72 |





