








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 75 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 19 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
246 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 496 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 92 | 19% |
| Smokes | 169 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 115 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 120 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $74,820 of utility $172 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Easyziko | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | Traiz! | 100% | 2 |
| #3 | Quaxieツ | 100% | 2 |
| #4 | KalashnikoV | 67% | 3 |
| #5 | xykaplyatt | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Easyziko | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | Traiz! | 100% | 2 |
| #3 | Quaxieツ | 100% | 2 |
| #4 | KalashnikoV | 67% | 3 |
| #5 | xykaplyatt | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xykaplyatt | 22 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #2 | Traiz! | 14 | 0.33 | 0 min |
| #3 | KalashnikoV | 9 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| #4 | Quaxieツ | 7 | 0.18 | 0 min |
| #5 | Easyziko | 5 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Easyziko | +3.83 | 70 | 56 |
| #2 | Quaxieツ | +3.61 | 58 | 70 |
| #3 | Traiz! | +3.18 | 73 | 77 |
| #4 | wavey | +2.51 | 94 | 68 |
| #5 | KalashnikoV | +1.75 | 74 | 77 |





