








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 398 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1464 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,645 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1297 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1250 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1732 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1366 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $431,434 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lil Blyaty | 63% | 16 |
| #2 | knus' | 57% | 53 |
| #3 | ✪RobinRhymes | 55% | 11 |
| #4 | Ekman | 54% | 50 |
| #5 | Znusen | 53% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pazzy | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | knus' | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Znusen | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Ekman | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Lil Blyaty | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪RobinRhymes | +3.84 | 86 | 54 |
| #2 | knus' | +3.22 | 64 | 71 |
| #3 | wallace' | +2.63 | 64 | 68 |
| #4 | D | +0.72 | 62 | 66 |
| #5 | Lil Blyaty | +0.32 | 63 | 58 |





