








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 49 matches | ||
| Premier | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
714 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,216 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 783 | 24% |
| Smokes | 752 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 801 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 880 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $248,265 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | herzao | 40% | 10 |
| #2 | CrashOverride | 40% | 15 |
| #3 | DANΓARINO DOIDERA | 33% | 6 |
| #4 | tet | 33% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | herzao | 40% | 10 |
| #2 | CrashOverride | 40% | 15 |
| #3 | DANΓARINO DOIDERA | 33% | 6 |
| #4 | tet | 33% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DANΓARINO DOIDERA | 3 | 0.0273 |
| #2 | herzao | 2 | 0.0124 |
| #3 | tet | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | CrashOverride | 1 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CrashOverride | 36 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #2 | tet | 35 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | herzao | 20 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | DANΓARINO DOIDERA | 8 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DANΓARINO DOIDERA | +5.10 | 82 | 48 |
| #2 | tet | +1.26 | 63 | 41 |
| #3 | CrashOverride | -1.40 | 56 | 43 |
| #4 | Lopan π€‘π | -2.63 | 17 | 60 |
| #5 | herzao | -3.92 | 37 | 65 |





