








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 238 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 232 matches | ||
| Premier | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2368 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,224 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2903 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3292 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2763 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2266 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,121,154 of utility $172 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 754 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Töbias | 64% | 33 |
| #2 | KosovaR | 57% | 21 |
| #3 | Fortuna | 57% | 56 |
| #4 | ✪ Essi | 54% | 48 |
| #5 | Icy | 54% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Icy | 295 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #2 | Fortuna | 194 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | ✪ Essi | 113 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | Töbias | 71 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | Arons1 | 49 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Töbias | +1.50 | 67 | 59 |
| #2 | ✪ Essi | +1.24 | 75 | 57 |
| #3 | KosovaR | +0.55 | 55 | 56 |
| #4 | Fortuna | +0.36 | 70 | 51 |
| #5 | Arons1 | -0.43 | 57 | 61 |





