








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 55 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 21 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
746 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,359 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 535 | 23% |
| Smokes | 638 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 730 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 456 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $351,363 of utility $194 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 111 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n0fisch.de | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | Skovhund | 58% | 53 |
| #3 | 0kZe | 57% | 7 |
| #4 | n0fresh | 55% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n0fisch.de | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | Skovhund | 58% | 53 |
| #3 | 0kZe | 57% | 7 |
| #4 | n0fresh | 55% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skovhund | 11 | 0.0099 |
| #2 | n0fisch.de | 1 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0kZe | 30 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #2 | Skovhund | 29 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #3 | n0fisch.de | 15 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #4 | n0fresh | 5 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skovhund | +4.39 | 74 | 51 |
| #2 | n0fresh | +4.35 | 85 | 55 |
| #3 | n0fisch.de | -0.11 | 73 | 56 |
| #4 | rotte | -1.11 | 61 | 59 |
| #5 | 0kZe | -1.26 | 45 | 81 |





