








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 302 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1269 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,402 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1396 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1263 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 759 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 984 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $287,569 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 48 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cwn | 69% | 16 |
| #2 | ☣ⓂⓄⓃⒶ☣ | 67% | 18 |
| #3 | #☝Teixeira☝# society.gg | 63% | 19 |
| #4 | creuza | 61% | 28 |
| #5 | jofimeca | 61% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | #☝Teixeira☝# society.gg | 63% | 19 |
| #4 | creuza | 61% | 28 |
| #5 | jofimeca | 61% | 28 |
| #6 | Manel SC | 58% | 36 |
| #7 | ShoxY FAIL | 25% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Manel SC | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jofimeca | 202 | 0.32 | 6 min |
| #2 | Manel SC | 111 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #3 | creuza | 73 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | cwn | 58 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | #☝Teixeira☝# society.gg | 45 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Manel SC | +2.30 | 74 | 51 |
| #2 | jofimeca | +1.46 | 74 | 84 |
| #3 | creuza | +1.10 | 75 | 63 |
| #4 | sAnti iwnl | +0.73 | 76 | 65 |
| #5 | #☝Teixeira☝# society.gg | -0.36 | 72 | 47 |





