








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 452 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 73 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3467 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,766 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3446 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2431 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1551 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2338 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,206,713 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Panda | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | MajorSky | 58% | 45 |
| #3 | marco | 51% | 120 |
| #4 | Dogifer | 50% | 46 |
| #5 | Dr. Jal | 43% | 112 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | MajorSky | 58% | 45 |
| #3 | marco | 51% | 120 |
| #4 | Dogifer | 50% | 46 |
| #5 | Dr. Jal | 43% | 112 |
| #6 | RA | 43% | 194 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | marco | 10 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | RA | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Dr. Jal | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Dogifer | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Panda | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RA | 1026 | 0.26 | 26 min |
| #2 | marco | 385 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #3 | Dr. Jal | 263 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | Panda | 87 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #5 | Dogifer | 59 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Panda | +2.15 | 60 | 58 |
| #2 | RA | +1.62 | 72 | 64 |
| #3 | Dogifer | +1.50 | 66 | 51 |
| #4 | marco | +0.72 | 62 | 61 |
| #5 | Dr. Jal | -0.66 | 73 | 55 |





