








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 576 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 233 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2260 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,978 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2088 | 35% |
| Smokes | 836 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 1939 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1115 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $837,252 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 176 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Monkey_Daron | 48% | 29 |
| #2 | ★hellMic.S™★ | 46% | 57 |
| #3 | Zezinho Pe de Fogo | 43% | 42 |
| #4 | Chiquim BALA TORTA | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Monkey_Daron | 48% | 29 |
| #2 | ★hellMic.S™★ | 46% | 57 |
| #3 | Zezinho Pe de Fogo | 43% | 42 |
| #4 | Chiquim BALA TORTA | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★hellMic.S™★ | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Monkey_Daron | 4 | 0.0063 |
| #3 | Zezinho Pe de Fogo | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Chiquim BALA TORTA | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zezinho Pe de Fogo | 161 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #2 | Monkey_Daron | 158 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| #3 | Chiquim BALA TORTA | 46 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | ★hellMic.S™★ | 38 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Daemon | +1.58 | 45 | 60 |
| #2 | Chiquim BALA TORTA | -0.06 | 18 | 53 |
| #3 | ★hellMic.S™★ | -0.12 | 35 | 52 |
| #4 | Monkey_Daron | -1.22 | 14 | 54 |
| #5 | Zezinho Pe de Fogo | -3.06 | 15 | 73 |





