








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 100 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 66 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1611 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,390 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1195 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2020 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1746 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1429 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $722,336 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 48 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Makkn | 64% | 22 |
| #2 | OmSkuren | 63% | 24 |
| #3 | Puffrasson | 59% | 17 |
| #4 | Fallshow | 51% | 78 |
| #5 | InVinCible | 51% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | InVinCible | 14 | 0.0123 |
| #2 | Uncle Bej2 | 14 | 0.0124 |
| #3 | Tank | 10 | 0.0170 |
| #4 | Mode: Restitutor Orbis | 4 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Makkn | 4 | 0.0090 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fallshow | 241 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #2 | Mode: Restitutor Orbis | 177 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | AK | 125 | 0.27 | 3 min |
| #4 | InVinCible | 105 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Uncle Bej2 | 103 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AK | +3.45 | 95 | 61 |
| #2 | Slichan *Meow | +3.34 | 77 | 61 |
| #3 | Tank | +0.99 | 75 | 55 |
| #4 | -Itsmephillyy!- | +0.50 | 80 | 68 |
| #5 | InVinCible | +0.48 | 44 | 57 |





