








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 80 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
262 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 376 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 86 | 23% |
| Smokes | 64 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 176 | 47% |
| Molotovs | 50 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $97,119 of utility $194 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 99 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Keysane | 47 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #2 | Proudley | 40 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | Daddy Panda | 28 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #4 | PixelatedTears | 21 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| #5 | Pepe Le Pew | 14 | 0.23 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pepe Le Pew | +6.43 | 57 | 60 |
| #2 | ReQz | +6.14 | 96 | 77 |
| #3 | Cooky | +5.56 | 24 | 67 |
| #4 | PixelatedTears | +4.43 | 74 | 30 |
| #5 | Keysane | +2.70 | 66 | 55 |





