








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 981 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 458 matches | ||
| Wingman | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




65 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7832 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,435 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3895 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3615 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 4405 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3520 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,069,992 of utility $230 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 847 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Defacto | 48% | 48 |
| #7 | DemonikButter | 47% | 126 |
| #8 | Thediddler | 47% | 92 |
| #9 | kouki | 47% | 86 |
| #10 | Lil Butterknife | 44% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nickels | +3.06 | 83 | 51 |
| #2 | Jaywin | +2.28 | 71 | 54 |
| #3 | ✿neb✿ | +1.90 | 74 | 54 |
| #4 | DemonikButter | +1.65 | 63 | 37 |
| #5 | Defacto | +0.27 | 66 | 31 |





