








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 34 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
853 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,221 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1838 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1202 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1352 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 829 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $104,461 of utility $42 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lv. 0 Crook [o-o] | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | ᴍ1ᴋᴇNᴏʟᴀɴ | 51% | 72 |
| #3 | ElecTr0 | 50% | 12 |
| #4 | Krabbe Labb | 48% | 25 |
| #5 | ost | 48% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᴍ1ᴋᴇNᴏʟᴀɴ | +4.10 | 79 | 65 |
| #2 | Lv. 0 Crook [o-o] | +3.30 | 62 | 47 |
| #3 | ost | +1.56 | 58 | 65 |
| #4 | ElecTr0 | +1.02 | 71 | 52 |
| #5 | Krabbe Labb | +0.22 | 30 | 65 |





