








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 8 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4179 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,053 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4193 | 38% |
| Smokes | 3368 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1014 | 9% |
| Molotovs | 2478 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $696,185 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 68 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Volare | 68% | 19 |
| #2 | prikisiuw | 68% | 22 |
| #3 | D'Vine | 68% | 37 |
| #4 | Tenka | 58% | 31 |
| #5 | Schiz0 | 57% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HALSEY | 306 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #2 | Tenka | 260 | 0.40 | 5 min |
| #3 | D'Vine | 186 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #4 | prikisiuw | 112 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| #5 | Schiz0 | 99 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | D'Vine | +5.74 | 88 | 59 |
| #2 | prikisiuw | +5.41 | 90 | 59 |
| #3 | Jeruk Nipis | +3.51 | 84 | 63 |
| #4 | Schiz0 | +1.74 | 66 | 56 |
| #5 | HALSEY | +0.91 | 61 | 42 |





