








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1025 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 351 matches | ||
| Premier | 196 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Esplay | 5 matches | 1,961 | |
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10039 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,326 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7565 | 28% |
| Smokes | 8141 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4756 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 6864 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,749,494 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fin | 65% | 48 |
| #2 | mehinosu | 61% | 56 |
| #3 | Solzet | 60% | 112 |
| #4 | HbG | 60% | 107 |
| #5 | Meluksli | 59% | 227 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TazPig | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | Meluksli | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | HbG | 5 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Tillis | 3 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | Batecod | 3 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meluksli | 684 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #2 | Batecod | 653 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| #3 | Bastardo | 579 | 0.13 | 18 min |
| #4 | TazPig | 452 | 0.10 | 13 min |
| #5 | HbG | 426 | 0.19 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meluksli | +2.91 | 78 | 62 |
| #2 | TazPig | +1.70 | 84 | 59 |
| #3 | razeh | +1.57 | 85 | 66 |
| #4 | Tillis | +0.50 | 68 | 66 |
| #5 | Solzet | +0.46 | 77 | 70 |





