








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 535 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 448 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3276 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,356 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1792 | 10% |
| Smokes | 6980 | 40% |
| HE Grenades | 4168 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4416 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $912,888 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 689 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CocaBienFraiChakaL | 57% | 42 |
| #2 | belle machine | 56% | 32 |
| #3 | {R.o.w} farfadaY | 53% | 70 |
| #4 | Heindixzou | 53% | 36 |
| #5 | FTX0 | 51% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShuRikeN | 4 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | cécilia | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Sir Golden | 3 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | cowbZ | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | Alcaponne | 2 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | b0uNche ツ | +3.44 | 76 | 62 |
| #2 | Sir Golden | +2.76 | 68 | 60 |
| #3 | ShuRikeN | +2.59 | 64 | 63 |
| #4 | belle machine | +2.00 | 74 | 51 |
| #5 | CocaBienFraiChakaL | +0.77 | 58 | 69 |





