








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 330 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 476 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4218 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,186 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6479 | 27% |
| Smokes | 6571 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5120 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 6016 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,563,860 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | youngtuna | 56% | 64 |
| #2 | Pauli | 55% | 190 |
| #3 | Uulari | 53% | 214 |
| #4 | john | 53% | 40 |
| #5 | Turbaari | 48% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JUTSKA | 13 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Pauli | 11 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Jamo | 10 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Pebe | 8 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Jogeri | 7 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jamo | 756 | 0.13 | 22 min |
| #2 | Durva | 588 | 0.12 | 15 min |
| #3 | Pauli | 439 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #4 | Pebe | 423 | 0.06 | 10 min |
| #5 | JUTSKA | 418 | 0.06 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pauli | +3.54 | 68 | 67 |
| #2 | john | +2.29 | 69 | 74 |
| #3 | JUTSKA | +1.56 | 63 | 58 |
| #4 | Medar | +0.80 | 53 | 72 |
| #5 | Durva | +0.18 | 73 | 63 |





