










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1057 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 152 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2081 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,252 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2548 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1719 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1994 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1991 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,094,273 of utility $229 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fatboy noa:/ | 59% | 17 |
| #2 | Greven | 56% | 103 |
| #3 | Bateau | 55% | 58 |
| #4 | ISBILPEEK | 53% | 36 |
| #5 | Forbizon | 48% | 145 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Forbizon | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | Bateau | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | ISBILPEEK | 2 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | fatboy noa:/ | 2 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | Greven | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Forbizon | 193 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #2 | Greven | 143 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | ISBILPEEK | 123 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #4 | mathiaS | 85 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | Bateau | 64 | 0.06 | 2 min |





