








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 744 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 78 matches | ||
| Faceit | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7948 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,228 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4902 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4828 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3685 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 4813 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,063,698 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 404 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | div3ci | 68% | 120 |
| #2 | bwoo | 66% | 279 |
| #3 | duck | 63% | 168 |
| #4 | spatsuu | 62% | 63 |
| #5 | bev | 60% | 523 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | bwoo | 66% | 279 |
| #3 | duck | 63% | 168 |
| #4 | spatsuu | 62% | 63 |
| #5 | bev | 60% | 523 |
| #6 | akali | 55% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bev | 13 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | bwoo | 12 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | duck | 9 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | akali | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | div3ci | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bwoo | 1610 | 0.29 | 43 min |
| #2 | bev | 1434 | 0.14 | 35 min |
| #3 | duck | 811 | 0.24 | 20 min |
| #4 | akali | 94 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | spatsuu | 81 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cam | +3.35 | 84 | 56 |
| #2 | bwoo | +3.21 | 85 | 74 |
| #3 | div3ci | +0.89 | 81 | 53 |
| #4 | akali | +0.41 | 86 | 54 |
| #5 | spatsuu | +0.13 | 68 | 52 |





