








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 763 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 377 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 65 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4293 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,653 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7707 | 34% |
| Smokes | 6894 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4230 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3822 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $694,079 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 360 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tweety | 69% | 29 |
| #2 | j0hnny':v | 60% | 104 |
| #3 | PrinzEichel | 57% | 83 |
| #4 | FiReSToRm | 56% | 82 |
| #5 | KiAS_[GER] | 55% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | PrinzEichel | 57% | 83 |
| #4 | FiReSToRm | 56% | 82 |
| #5 | KiAS_[GER] | 55% | 42 |
| #6 | BrucederStein | 53% | 30 |
| #7 | Jakalele | 40% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PrinzEichel | 6 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | j0hnny':v | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Tweety | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | KiAS_[GER] | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FiReSToRm | 221 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #2 | PrinzEichel | 214 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #3 | j0hnny':v | 136 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | Tweety | 75 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | Jakalele | 54 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j0hnny':v | +3.14 | 73 | 41 |
| #2 | FiReSToRm | +1.32 | 67 | 68 |
| #3 | amseline | +0.55 | 64 | 74 |
| #4 | PrinzEichel | +0.32 | 64 | 51 |
| #5 | Tweety | -0.24 | 43 | 58 |





