








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 502 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3020 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,247 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2634 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2107 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1349 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2157 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $566,107 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Zephyor! | 80% | 20 |
| #2 | NAT' | 74% | 27 |
| #3 | PHOB; | 74% | 23 |
| #4 | Legshotmachine | 73% | 15 |
| #5 | Michon | 72% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KxN | 550 | 0.23 | 16 min |
| #2 | jamel demoove | 304 | 0.28 | 11 min |
| #3 | hozeeeee | 291 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #4 | K.ma | 244 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #5 | Michon | 214 | 0.26 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eveN. | +3.82 | 93 | 65 |
| #2 | ICREW | +3.66 | 96 | 70 |
| #3 | Michon | +3.46 | 83 | 77 |
| #4 | ✪ Zephyor! | +2.98 | 90 | 73 |
| #5 | ?RespectAllFearNone | +2.40 | 87 | 66 |





