










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 208 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
868 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,803 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1752 | 36% |
| Smokes | 1109 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1213 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 729 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $128,766 of utility $66 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 301 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | heikki mustonen | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | tricky | 71% | 21 |
| #3 | kEMPE | 60% | 15 |
| #4 | Raldemar | 59% | 46 |
| #5 | Skillzツ | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | heikki mustonen | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | tricky | 71% | 21 |
| #3 | kEMPE | 60% | 15 |
| #4 | Raldemar | 59% | 46 |
| #5 | Skillzツ | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | heikki mustonen | 3 | 0.0138 |
| #2 | Raldemar | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | kEMPE | 2 | 0.0066 |
| #4 | tricky | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Raldemar | 205 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #2 | heikki mustonen | 70 | 0.32 | 2 min |
| #3 | kEMPE | 69 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #4 | tricky | 44 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | Skillzツ | 10 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | heikki mustonen | +2.36 | 66 | 60 |
| #2 | tricky | +1.81 | 61 | 64 |
| #3 | Raldemar | +1.13 | 60 | 71 |
| #4 | Broken | +0.58 | 75 | 74 |
| #5 | kEMPE | -0.22 | 77 | 27 |





