










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 331 matches | ||
| Faceit | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 78 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3720 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,224 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3352 | 19% |
| Smokes | 4486 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 6371 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 3015 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,244,601 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 328 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SqZ | 63% | 27 |
| #2 | JACKALz | 51% | 222 |
| #3 | Jimkillah | 50% | 40 |
| #4 | Tirakoté ♿ | 48% | 126 |
| #5 | Jean Guile | 46% | 123 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tirakoté ♿ | 9 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | Zepe187 | 7 | 0.0062 |
| #3 | JACKALz | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Jean Guile | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | coub | 4 | 0.0066 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SqZ | +1.35 | 67 | 67 |
| #2 | coub | +0.74 | 37 | 76 |
| #3 | JACKALz | +0.72 | 58 | 73 |
| #4 | Tirakoté ♿ | +0.65 | 65 | 68 |
| #5 | .Mkv | +0.48 | 56 | 56 |





